Archives for May 2014

The church is not a building…

My husband came home and loaded my son when he got word we could make it through town to where our church’s meeting space once stood. I paced. I triple checked that my girls were still asleep. Finally, the oldest two awoke and I loaded my big girls and strapped a still sleeping baby into her carseat. I couldn’t do nothing.

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We poked our way through town. I have yet to ride through town...maybe its good. I haven't had the chance to take-in all the emptiness. I kept my eyes on the road. I carefully drove over downed power lines and past lines of care as we went down the path that deadly wind smeared through our community from southwest to northeast. I pulled up to the slab barricaded by debris just in time to see my husband pull his guitar from a back wall. I cheered yards away! God is so randomly good. He is in the big and in the small of our lives.

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I left my girls in the still-running van as I jumped out and wove my way through the maze of red iron, insulation and unrecognizables. I laughed as I looked at that empty slab. It was as if someone had taken a giant shopvac, sucked everything up, and then blew it out from the center of the building.

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The strong cinderblock walls lay on the ground as if that burst of materials from within the facility just tipped them over like a poorly constructed toddler creation. The walls, still in tacked, laid flat on three sides several feet away from where they were formerly attached to their foundation.

I will remember our Covenant

The only wall remaining stands as a beckon to the world that my God reigns. He makes and KEEPS promises. Our world may be torn to piece by our sin but He is coming back. Those colored walls that were once the valley kids' hall can now be the only thing of color spotted among the public pictures of drab scraps.

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Matt ran home to uniform himself for digging for scraps of what once held our church as they worshiped and our babies as they were loved-on. I stood in amazement at what was left. The call that morning at 3:30 had confirmed, “It’s gone. Completely gone. There’s nothing left.” But there was something. There were glimpses of the generosity that had been poured on us over the past. I dug my kids out of the car and guided them through nails and gagged building. All worries about how I would answer tough questions floated up to my Lord as my children giggled on that dirty slab. Cheered as they retrieved strown markers under the edge of sheetrock.

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Moments later, like a tear-jerking scene in a movie, the church, our people, Christ’s followers that met in the space just the day before poured in from every angle. Trucks with trailers, men with work gloves, and women with bright eyes galloped with a hope that only comes from a saving knowledge of Jesus onto the slab. In a town full of desperation, His hope oozed. God’s not dead, He’s surely alive. He’s living on the inside, roaring like a lion. Digging like a grown man. Giggling like a child. Glowing like a valley girl.

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The “clean-up” call from Facebook turned into a unifying block-party of sorts for this growing body of believers. Crossing from one side of the “building” to the other, you could hear the echoes of our people reassuring one another, “The church is not a building, it’s the people chasing after Jesus.” As curfew for our town neared, we began clearing plates of donated food and drinks, hugged, and cheerfully swapped stories of where we planned to get to work in the morning. Testimonies of what God was already doing in and through the members of the valley were evidence that the valley is here for such a time as this! Each individual is here to be used in a way that no one else could be. They are willing and ready to answer God’s calling to join Him and the work He’s started in Vilonia.

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The Morning After {the tornado}

We woke early after a loooong night of little sleep and too much worry, wondering if our friends were okay, if our church's meeting space had survived, and what exactly had happened to our community. Dropping off our kids with their grandparents freed us up to go out in search of the answers to all those worries. I was focused as we working our way through roadblocks and security down to our friends’ home where our friends’ home once stood. I was on a mission, get to their house. Find her. Give her a hug and a Dr. Pepper. I had a plan.

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I found her neighborhood, or what was left. I could see the demolished street from atop the hill where we sat behind law enforcement who were protecting our friends from looters. I found her home, or what was left. A sad resemblance of the place I dropped my kids so many times so Matt and I could go on a date night. Once inside, I found my friend, what was left of her. I lost focus. I lost my self-controlled-persona. She wept on my shoulder while uttering confusion over her spared life and not that of her son’s best friends who had eaten dinner with them less than 12 hours before the digging through rubble began. She may not have been intact as I'd left her or once knew her but she was becoming a new creation.

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She gained composure as did I and ask for a task. I headed to a bedroom with the goal of retrieving any remaining toys and clothes. I dug and packed. I shook off glass and shards of home. I crammed totes full of once treasured belongings that are now “remains”. I found glimpses of HOPE among the destruction. Signs God was for us, not against us. He had not left us.

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I glanced out the window as I threw a piece of lumber through the shattered glass only to see a world so broken I had no chance of making a dent. I couldn’t comfort those whose house was g.o.n.e. Whose children were g.o.n.e. as they lay in a hospital bed and those who knew and loved them dug through their pile of stuff in hopes of finding anything of value.

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Just months earlier I'd been sitting in this very house, celebrating that my fourth child would soon be here. I Still Have Her. Alive and well. Tucked safely away with her Nanna as I wonder how my house was untouched with a pile of twigs unwavered, the house I stand in has walls and survivors, and the one down the street is void of life.

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I prayed for discernment. Jesus had something for me- Something that I would have the pleasure of being a tiny part of. I got to work with the comfort that in my action, my Redeemer is bigger than my failure. Action is all I could do. Working. Feeling I was attempting to do. something. to right this wrong.

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Day one of aftermath was overwhelming to say the least. Swirling questions of God's sovereignty.

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Before accomplishing anything close to what I wanted, I left to grab my babies for lunch. I nursed and snuggled my baby. I hugged and gave extra grace to my bigs. They napped and I tried to tackle the mounting text, Facebook notifications and messages that were flooding in from family, local friends, long-distance friends, and heart friends from across the world.

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I am a cog. I am just a cog. I am just a cog for the great work Christ is starting in this time and place. Bring on the pain. Bring on the mountain of request to help that I am unqualified to assist with. Bring on the challenge of learning to love this broken, scattered, hurting place. I am thankful that we can find Hope, Joy, and Peace amidst the storm even when we don't understand it. Now its time to put to action the hope, joy, and peace that I have and can only be found in the One who made me.

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