Dear Tween Me
“Do YOU wanna go to bed without Dinner?”
The phrase I never thought I'd use...
"You're wanna go to bed without Dinner?"
Our kids where strategically tearing apart the awesome playroom they're blessed with playing a cute game of "family" the other night when it was almost time for dinner. Well, I say the kids but really it was Maggie. Jamin was taking his second nap and Izzie had grown tired of being bossed around by her "tend mamma" and was entertaining herself with random dress up.
I understand kids don't do transitions well and so I'd given the normal, "30 minutes 'til dinner" call and then wandered into the playroom to see what we were dealing with before going back to finish dinner. Holly Shmagolly! Mags had Every last food item, dish, and utensil from her kitchen in a cube...my bad, "grocery store". I took a deep breath refusing to let the words, "I've TOLD you not to do that..." creep through my clenched teeth.
Maggie mission- you have 30 minutes before dinner. It's time to clean up you kitchen. I want all of these things put back where they go so you'll be able to find them tomorrow and they won't get torn up.
Izzie's mission- you have 30 minutes before dinner. It's time to clean up all your dress-up stuff. Put in into the correct basket. I also need you to be in charge of putting all your babies away on their shelf.
15 minutes later we had fries in the over and Matt was creating "hamburger melts" on the griddle. I went back in to help finish up the cleaning. Rrrrr I found Maggie had dug out more things {where she found more to dig out I have no idea} while Izzie sat amongst her pile of dresses rocking a baby. Now, don't get me wrong, this playroom has seen bigger disasters in it's short life and this wasn't even in the top 100. I had no idea why they hadn't touched this miniscule mess. The mantra uttered in our house at least 5 times a day is, "When do we listen? 1st Time." Obedience is what we are trying to teach her. Not because I'm on a power trip 'cause honestly I have a hard time even using the phrase, "obey me" to my child BUT obedience is what God knows is best for us. As THE Father of all existence, He obviously knows what He's doing, loves us more than we could ever imagine, and ALWAYS has what's best for us in mind. I want my children to understand to 'listen 1st time'. I don't wan their testimony of coming to Christ to have crazy blunders because they were running from His perfect authority.
I showed Izzie where the basket was for her dress up stuff and then creatively {bahahaha} ask her to "put her babies to bed. Kiss them night night and make sure they all make it onto the shelf together." She liked that idea and began searching for all the dolls who belonged on the shelf. As I approached Mags, eyebrows scowling, she pretended not to hear or see me as I tried to show her that her job really was simple and that she was so good at cleaning up it wouldn't take her much time at all. Nothing. I sighed and reminded them they had less than 15 minutes. I threatened, "You can't come to the table until your job is done" which works every day at lunch time. These kiddos love doing things as a family and can't imagine missing out on our entire family sitting together at dinner.
About 5 minutes passed and Izzie emerged from the room of play. She claimed she's completed her job and ask if she could help set the table. Umm Hmm I thought and went to check. Sure enough she had finished both the dolls and the dress-up. Mags sat whining in the corner of her kitchen telling me it was "too hard" and that she would "never be able to finish". With the reminder of her skills and the simplicity of the task I went back to the kitchen to give Izzie dishes to set out.
The timer on the oven went off and we called everyone to the table. Mags sat next to her cube and the kitchen motionless yet very loud with disappointment. We began passing out dinner, prayed together, and everyone began munching. Mags whimpered and pouted, "I Can't Do It!" I don't know what she was doing in there...I mean really. No one's in there to play with. She wasn't using the toys she refused to put away. There wasn't a long trek from the mound of items back to their proper place.
Everyone finished dinner. We let the younger two watch an evening movie and hoped this would give even more insentive to clean up so she could eat and watch a movie with everyone. Nothing. We offered a special bubble bath. The time came and went. Jamin and Izzie raced up the stairs, took their bath, and headed to bed. The tantrum scream began from Mags end of the playroom. I was so frustrated that I went in and helped get the crats out where the food was to be stored. Tried to give step-by-step directions for how quickly she could finish. Just grunts and flailing legs of frustration.
Then the words came...I mean, the family table time, movie, bubble bath, the insentient count-downs for every intensives coming and going, none of it worked..."Do YOU want to go to bed without dinner?" Surely this would work. "NO!!!! I'm hungry." Awe the word hunger nearly broke me down. I was ready to send her to the kitchen to snatch up whatever unhealthiness she wanted as I quickly cleaned up her job. Then sanity set in.
This is a #firstworldproblem.
My kids is not really hungry. Did she get to eat at the time we have scheduled as a family, no. But she had a great breakfast, big lunch, all the drinks she wants, and a yummy snack. She was not in need of food. I waited. Silent. Until her fit was over. She sat there staring at me as if to say, "I'm going to win this." I walked out of the room telling her, "You have 10 minutes."
4 minutes later my Magdalene Reese Rothacher ran into the room shouting, "I FINISHED!" She had. That was how long her mission took to accomplish. Her skill set way out weighed her task at hand. I congratulated her and escorted her to the plate of cold dinner where she chowed it down consistently saying, "Daddy, this is GOOD!"
If my 4 and 1/2 year old is this stubborn with me, how cool must God be for always having patients with me. Always being kind. Putting up with my "I can't do it"s when He will NEVER ask me to do something He has equipped me to accomplish all the while walking with me through it. Woooh. God, You are GOOD!
~~~
Just in case I need to say this- this is the 1st {and possibly the last} time we have threatened to send a child to bed without dinner. We stand firm on letting our Yes be YES and our No be NO. Our children will trust our word. We will think through what we ask of them before we ask.My Comfy Peace that, “God’s GOT This!”
God's been opening doors all over the place since we committed to this God-size dream He gave us.
I mean, we shouldn't be surprised right? If he ask us to do something He's not gonna sit back and laugh at us while we fumble around making fools of ourselves while trying to accomplish it. Heck no. God's already got a crazy detailed manuscript He's directing and we are just blessed to be asked to have an extra part in a tiny scene of this movie we call eternity.
Way back in November 2011, when my husband shared with me that he was sure God was calling him to be a pastor {and if you know me and my hubs, this would be a shock to all of you as well}. Not only was he supposed to be a 'grown-up pastor' now but he was being asked to PLANT a Church.
WHAT?!?! Aren't there enough churches? Everyone is leaving the ones that exist. How are we supposed to do any better than what's already out there? We know NOTHING about running a church.
These were the questions that I later learned were flying through my husband's head when he began sorting this God-sized dream out. He joked about some of these things but it never seemed to be a dampener on what God was gonna let us do. I'm slightly childish in this way. When God ask me to do something, I'm sure its Him, I just do it. Some may call that extreme faith but I think its just how He made me...kinda like being short ;o)
If I give myself lots of time to think about something, that's when the questions come. Not the, "don't you know I can't do this God"s but the "well, what can I do to move this along" questions. This life of limbo is either one of two things; God teaching us {lots of} something(s) OR satan trying to mess with my head and get me to jack things up by trying to do it on my own during the waiting. Daily I remind my self of the spiritual battle going on and wiggle down into my comfy peace that, "God's got this!" Some days that works and other day I'm a panicky mess, don't ask my hubs, he'll give ya the horror stories. hehe
Any how, about all these doors God is opening since saying Yes to this adventure:
- a woman, we had never met before, who is committed {and I mean Committed!} to give us 1/3 of her already meager income
- a partner church who is interested in helping plant autonomous churches
- 100 folding chairs
- friends who have a heart for church plants
- friends who have a heart for the community we are going to minister
- random jobs {never saw ourselves working} to offset our income
- a radio interview {that came out of the blue} where I was able to share part of our story, as well as educate listeners on church planting and the de-churched
- can lights, a projector and a screen Fo Free!
- a couple churches who have committed to praying for us and/or financially supporting us
- and tons of other things I've forgotten to mention
SEE UPDATE AT THE BOTTOM!
Things we are faithing God has in the works:
- a space for The Valley to meet in weekly {praying for "The General", an old Dollar General in a store front}
- people who will commit to being part of the leadership: ie. Financial Advisor, Worship Team, Administrator
{UPDATE: we've had vocalist, drummer, and other musicans come talk with us recently!} - A passionate move of God like no other ever seen in Vilonia, AR where those who know Jesus catch fire and Salvation spreads across that community so ramped that no one can deny GOD is at work!
I haven't talked a whole lot about the logistics of what we're doing on here...mainly 'cause I don't know if you'll care Or what you really wanna know, already know, or could care less to know. Blow up the comment section or message me. I'd love to share more. If there is a lot of interest I'll even do an entire Q & A post for ya.
Speaking of which; Matt and I will be doing a question and answer session a One Church {Conway} on the evening of January 27th. If your interested in more info about this then ask away!
I've also provided a link to the interview I mentioned above if you'd like to hear it. It's an hour long program but you can skip ~15 minutes in to where my interview starts and of course fast-forward through the commercial breaks. My part of the interview is really only about 20 minutes.
Download HERE to Listen
UPDATE:
I wrote this last week and when it went live this morning my husband was in the process of picking up an old screen someone had donated only to find out that they were searching for more equipment items to bless us with. Thank you so much Mark Cox & Indian Springs BC for being Jesus through extravagant generosity! And the Fagan family for letting us borrow your ginormous covered trailer to hall it all in. AND to Pappa Dean for helping us pick it up {and for storing it until we get a space of our own!
God is so randomly Good. Just when we think we understand Him... waBam!
And, if any of your readers out there in cyberspace happen to be in the Conway/Vilonia area:
The Roth Babes’ Meeting
I LOVE my lil family!!!
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For those interested in getting some questions answered about this "Valley" thing, come see us!
For size comparison, check out the old school video I posted yesterday when we just had 'the girls' and were testing out our mad rapping skills ;o)
Swagger Wagon {the Rothacher original}
So, the hubs and I LOVE being silly. We also love finding creative ways to tell people things. THIS is what we made about 2 and 1/2 years ago.
I just found this video as we were uploading our most resent video we made WITH all 3 of our kids.
THIS is what I found:
14,678 view and comments like:
THE BEST "Swagger Wagon" spinoff! - Well done! Along with the hard work and attention to detail - was original humor ( "Butt Paste! hilarious! ~ parents know what this is all about ) , and the fact you didn't rip off the original like most others on YouTube.
"Mommy Haircut! --- Big Poppa Gut"! I'm rolling on the floor!
GREAT JOB! 🙂
Hope you enjoy my gift to you: higher self-esteem ;o)