Play Dates: Helpful or Harmful?

So this morning I was stress'n trying to get my kids all out the door and to the post office as soon as they opened to avoid the huge line that was sure to form. When I realized I could possibly make morning happy hour at Sonic my heart palpitations started in. When I ask them to put their socks on Izzie instantly had a case of amnesia and couldn't remember how to. When I ask them to find their shoes they grabbed a mag-light and wondered in circles "hunting for treasure"...which was apparently Not the shoes I ask them to find. More of those Rrrr moments.

Whatev's. We made it alive to Sonic with breakfast in tow. We made it to the post office 2nd in line. Ugg. By now it was 9:15am. We were all fully dressed in our adorable new fall attire. All dressed up and now where to go. All that stress for that stress for 20 minutes of errands. Not Cool Mom! I was stressed. I'm sure they were stressed. So what does every evil mother do who rushed her kids like a mad women out of the house so early in the morning do? She takes her sweet babes to the park!

We swung around the corner with the "agreement" that we would stay a full hour if there was no whining when it was time to go. Wes screeched out tires into the parking lot and unloaded the crew like clowns out of the car once again. Watching my babes sprint toward the playground while breathing the crisp fresh fall air was just what I needed. And Totally what they needed: good dose of vitamin D and room to run!

We weren't there long when several more cars started making their was to fill in the few parking spots left. Slowly three other moms and two other toddlers trickled onto the scene. Being the single mom at the park with 3 littles I was playing 3 on 1 rather than our normal zone. But in between catching jumpers off the top of the slide platform and pushing swings, I took great joy in creeping on these ladies. I was intrigued.

They were all together. They planned to meet there to hang out. This was a full-fledged play date! This wasn't their 1st time either. They gathered at a picnic table right next to the playground with small lunch boxes they pulled out of their mom bags along with sippy cups and wipies. The little boy sat by his mommy and ate his healthy snackage she'd laid out for him. the small girl headed straight for the slide. This was a routine. The mom's jumped right into a conversation as if they were picking it up from where they left of last time. I could hardly tell which mom belonged to which child. None of them looked too much a like. They weren't family. Just three mom friends who met to hang out while their kids played.

I have to be honest. I was jealous. I wanted to walk over and act like I belonged. To jump right into the conversation about their older ones fits as they dropped them off at school. I wanted to show up early {or late} and not be the wierdo. I wanted to wear my T and comfy pants {or cutesy shirt and jeans} and still belong. How do women accomplish this.

I've tried. I've had a couple very successful play dates! It was usually just one other mom with her kids but one of my favorites was one at this same park with like four moms and a pile of kids. Every time I think, This, THIS is what I long for. Can we do this weekly? That's when it all falls through the cracks. One mom couldn't make it or we had to take off a week...or a month. With tons of other things going on. Too many schedules to coordinate. So we just don't do it again. Life got in the way.

The kids continued to play while I kinda pouted and I called my hubs, who was out of town. Then I saw it. The small girl, about 20 months old had escaped. She's scaled the wall holding in all the wood chips {who came up with jagged wood for kids to play on anyways?} in place under the playground equipment and was picking up speed down the grassy hill heading straight for the road. I quickly stuck my phone in my back pocket and ran after her. She hit the pavement so quickly she stumbled a bit giving me time to slide across the dew covered grass in front of her. "Ava! {the adorable name I heard them call her} We don't need to play down here. Lets head back up to the toy." As we walked hand in hand back to the playground she mom caught a glimpse of us out of the corner of her eye. She scrabbled to get to us, thanking me and then having a discussion about playground safety with her daughter.

Shortly after the road episode I heard a loud scary thud and a child's panics cry which makes every mother in the park jump to her feet. It was the little boy. He had been sitting next to his mom again for one of his many play breaks for munchy time. I wasn't even sure what to do. My concerned children began huddling near the crying boy and the three moms. I wondered over trying to assess the situation and see if I could help in any way. His mom was comforting him so I just tried to coral my kids away form them assuring them he would be fine. He'd face-planted right into the concrete sidewalk after getting his foot hung on the seat. The mom's started discussing how this kid was always getting hurt during play dates. He'd been wedged between a window and a table in the McDonald's playland.

These accidents got me thinking. Were play dates really more helpful or harmful? I mean, as SAHM {stay-at-home-mom's} we claim we need adult time. We need socialization. Was our selfishness really worth taking our attention away from our kids? Was it worth the close call in the street? Was it worth the shards of concrete and dirt in the kids forehead?

What do you think? Play Dates: Helpful or Harmful? Do you do play dates? How often do you meet? Why don't you?

If I see ya tomorrow, I tell ya the conclusion I've come to. What, hopefully, I have found the Bible tells us about this.

 

btw: anybody else a creeper like me? If not, pretend I didn't say all that ;o)

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Tutu Table Skirt (Sugar & Spice Baby Shower) {Thoughtful Thursday}

I told you last week I got to be apart of an awesome baby shower! The theme was "Sugar & Spice". We used hot pink and orange everywhere. It was so fun!!! I wanted to tell you about the fun tutu table skirt I got to make. I found the idea HERE on Pinterest. I wanted to show you how easy it was!

Supplies: {for a 12' round table}

  • 6 yards of white tulle
  • 3 yards of both orange and pink tulle
  • 12 feet of white ribbon
  • table-cloth hooks
  • lighter
  • scissors
  • some sort of measuring tool

Directions:

  1. measure & cut white tulle into 2 inch strips
  2. measure, cut {quickly burn the end of the ribbon to prevent reveling}, & string up ribbon {easiest way I found to know tulle on}
  3. loosely knot each strip evenly onto the ribbon {this takes a crazy amount of time}
  4. space white tulle evenly across the entire ribbon
  5. go through and group a few strips so there is even spaces available along the ribbon
  6. cut the orange and pink tulle in 2 inch strips
  7. loosely knot colored tulle evenly across the ribbon placing several strips together to make the color bolder
  8. once all the strips are on the ribbon, move them around to even them out
  9. when decorating for the shower {or whatever event you'd like to use the tutu for}, stretch the tutu around the table, using the table-cloth clips, hook the tutu evenly to the table
  10. fluff, rearrange, cutesy up the skirt prior to the shindig {we also layered an orange-colored plastic table clothe under

Have you tried fun things off Pinterest? Do share!

 



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Rrrrr

You know that moment? The one where your kids are getting on your nerves. The one where you look like a crazy among what appears to be organization feeling completely unraveled. Unraveled by those adorable little faces. The adorable faces with that wicked evil heart inside.

I feel like every time I share something, some grandiose idea I have for making life simpler with 3 tinies I loose that battle. I organize that stank'n toy room at least 3 different ways and it's all gone down the crapper. Last week my girls got grounded from nearly 90% of their playroom. No Joke! The rule is: if you don't clean up your toys before bed, whatever is left out gets picked up my mom and dad and put into "the closet". Most of the time the grounding last a full week.

Last week sucked! The grounding backfired. The 3rd night of this continual pattern, exasperated, I said, "Do you want to be grounded from these toys too?" to which my middle child just replied, "Sure. I be grounded." Rrrrrrrr Are you Kidding ME!!??!!

Morning Charts: fail

My husband does breakfast with the kids so he just herds them downstairs for feeding. I can't add "check to make sure they do their morning chart before they go down" is just not fair.

Daily Schedule/Chart: fail

I don't have the time an energy to set this chart up nightly and monitor if she's following it. And then there's the whole "I wanted to play teacher/mamma" which means she just pulled the entire chart down through the cards to the wind.

One 4 One Theory: making my older 2 take one bit of thing they didn't like and get rewarded with a bite they did worked GREAT! #3...not so much.

Jamin is a terribly picky eater. I had no idea kids were born knowing the difference between junk food and healthy food. My older 2 didn't seem to discriminate. J-man, he knows! We've begun forcing food into his mouth because he won't spit it out but he won't put it in his won mouth. WEIRD!

Centers: {I was gonna write this post...maybe not} they keep them generally in the right places and we can find things easily 98% of the time but as for only playing in 1 center at a time using the "preschool method" has been a flop

Every morning, the kids head straight for the kitchen center. Who wouldn't!?! What's not to love about an entire kitchen set just your size with fun pretend food sets and miniature dishes? But that's been the extent of it. They drag it out and wonder off. Rrrrrr

My kiddos drag out {more like DUMP} all kinds of stuff. If they are looking for a dress-up item, they dump the bucket, get the 1 item and leave the rest in a pile on the floor. As I kids, I never understood why I had to "put it away before you got something else out". I mean, where's the imagination in that? I totally understand not wanting to play in just 1 center when so many coordinate.

If you're a "mamma" in the kitchen center then of course you need a baby from the baby center and to be dressed appropriately from the dress-up center and you might even want to read your baby a book from the reading center and then take them for a ride in a car from the riding center and while you're out for a drive you might as well stop at the grocery store which means you need to drag out Every Single Piece of the Kitchen Center and sprawl it around the playroom so you can shop around in aisles and then your room is so trashed that you just have to take your computer from the electronic center into the living room with your babies who have multiplied and then the baby gets hungry so you have to grab just a few food items from the mess-of-a-kitchen-center and then you need more baby items from the baby center to properly take care of your baby and....

"If you give a mouse a cookie" much!?!?!

On top of that, yesterday they were ungrounded from all those toys. Matt and I put them back into place, had a discussion about why they were grounded, and showed them once again where things were expected to be. Ya know, the "if you wanna keep it, take care of your junk" talk. We were gone most of the day yesterday so it all hit the fan again this morning. The girls had destroyed the kitchen. Thank goodness there weren't too many other center Everywhere; Yet- we caught it in time. I found them dancing around in cute dress-up items while playing instruments from the music center. I told them it was great they were having so much fun together and that I liked it! Then I ask them to clean up the kitchen stuff real quick so they wouldn't have a huge mess to clean up later. MELT DOWN. Long story {slightly} short{er}, Mags ended up telling me to just give away certain toys so she wouldn't have to deal with them. Rrrrrr

One thing I can't handle is a rude ungrateful child. I had to go into the laundry room and cry over piles of clothing I was sorting, generously provided by God. We Have So Much. Do I give it all away? Will the the experience teach them anything? How much really needs to go with us when we move? I don't want giving away things to be a punishment. I want it to be a wiliness out of the overflow of compassion in their hearts.

Sorry, today's rant doesn't have a real conclusion. I could easily Jesus juke this bad boy with a good story about me, the mom, not being diligent enough to train them how to put away toys or me being lazy with my quiet time just like they are with their toys clean up or me being ungrateful for the things given me. But nope. Maybe it's my self-righteousness eeking out or impatient but I got none of that today.

If you have a suggestion, I'm always up for them but please gently tell me about it. I might snap today if I'm overwhelmed with clever mom's who are doing it right.

My prayer today: That Patients, Thankfulness, & Generosity bred in my heart will overflow in front of the eyes of my babes so they may follow in step.

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100 Days ’til Christmas

In honor of there being 100 Days until Christmas {99 'til Christmas Day},
I want to start getting you in the mood with this Veggie Tale Silly Song!

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So…my husband went back to prison yesterday…

It was his second time to grace the threshold of that place. Yesterday they wanted to see if he could walk, talk, & chew gum as my dad would put it. Really he had to climb stairs, drag around a limp body, and not die; pretty much the same thing.

I wish I could remember all the details leading up to this incarceration but basically Matt is being charged with loving his family too much and wanting to provide for them at any cost. Matt's been "self-employed" since the the May. Matt has been going to his "office" {McDs} and working via their WiFi as well as helping out TONS at home. With lots of travel and preparing our house for sale, Matt's been a busy man! Matt and I will be planting a church in Vilonia, AR. Our target launch date is Easter 2013! Until then, Matt is looking for work to supplement our income. The prison unit in Tucker is now hiring! Yesterday was the second 1/2 of the interview process. We'll keep ya updated on if Matt will be a permanent part of the Tucker unit ;o)

You can learn more about The Valley church HERE. Many of you have ask, "What does that mean." Well, let me try and answer the thousand different things that means:

Finances:

The Valley will be a part of the AR Southern Baptist Convention. All that means is we agree with the "Baptist faith and message" and agree to give a percentage of our tithes and offerings as a church to the convention to use in furthering the gospel in even bigger ways. We currently get $1000.00 from the state as "church planters." The state convention has a budget set aside to help supplement church planters income during the prep time of launching a new church plant. The rest of our income comes from our savings that God so miraculously taught us to obtain over the past 2 years. It's not much but with a tight budget we are always provided for. We also have a few friends/sponsors who give either monthly or when they can. We don't budget any specific amount from these because they are not always guaranteed but God knows exactly when we need that boast. Birds of the air right, Jess?

Location:

The Valley church is currently live in White Hall. The "Church" are the believers/Christ followers, so yes, it's current "location" is White Hall, which is about an hour and 1/2 from where God has ask us to plant. I know it may seem odd to some that we are not just planting where we are but God has already done so many seemingly random things in preparation for our coming that we have no doubt that's where we are supposed to be. If you know anyone who wants an awesome house for a great deal, send them our way! I love this house and would take it with us if we could put it on wheels. It's great for hosting, entertaining, and ministering! I can't wait to see how God will provide a new home base to minister out of in Vilonia.

We are also traveling weekly to One Church in Conway, AR. They will be a sponsor church when we launch. That just means we are enjoying doing life with, worshiping along side, and getting to help minister to those God has called them to until we launch and get to focus all our energy on those in Vilonia. One Church exist to make disciples, and part of doing that for them is helping plant churches.  They are planning to help us financially when we launch as well as with people {the most important thing}. That means some people will help us on our launch day with simple logistical things; some people will commit to help us for 3 months {nursery workers, parking lot help, greeters, etc}; and some will commit to Go and Stay with us and The Valley.

We are working on and praying through where God would have The Valley church meet for weekly worship together. We still having landed on that yet. ;O)

Current steps in the Process:

I know it may be confusing that we "aren't working", haven't launched, and seem to just be siting. There are lots of things we've already established...Let me try and briefly tell you some of the things we've been doing/praying through in preparation to launch The Valley in a quick list.

  • Vision
  • Core Values
  • Structure
  • Sermons/outlines/series {lots of them}
  • Logo
  • Community involvement ideas
  • Possible ministry opportunities
  • Building a core team {leadership}
  • Learning/studying what God has for Vilonia
  • Meeting with contacts/
  • Web design
  • Formulating nursery processes
  • Sharing our vision within individuals & churches
  • Viewing options for space to meet
  • Obtaining PO box
  • Waiting through legal things
  • and probably lots of random things I don't remember right now

So...my husband went back to prison yesterday to help provide for our family until we secure more consistent sponsors. I'm sure I didn't fully answer everything. If you have ANY questions about what we've been doing or more about church planting, Please, ask away or click on one of the gazillion links to the website I've hooked to the words The Valley!

Do you want to find out more about being a part of The Valley?

give   prayerhands copy   JOINUS

Just wanted to give an update on The Valley!

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