Honesty? When is the phrase "be honest, even when it hurts" a biblical thought?
I've always hated those people who said terrible hurtful things for the sake of "honesty". Ya know, "that dress make your butt look really big." That kind of thing. Just mean. No need for it. Why would you 'put that out there'?
Then there are those times when you ask someone how they're doing and they actually tell you. The Entire story. Yucky details and all. You get all uncomfortable. AWWWWkward!
Yep, that was me the other day. A friend asked how I was "dealing" with our transition...I went all awkward and yacked it up via text. Then, after a good cry, I sat down to write my 5 minute Friday Post and that's when it got even more awkward...Ugg I want to apologize if anyone is feeling that way about my 5 minute Friday post: Perspective. My intent was to write from a writing prompt. NOT to say unnecessary things to be hurtful. I would also like to say that truth does set you free. After hitting "publish" I knew I might get flack. One of the rules about 5MF is no editing. Which is really hard for me, especially since I'm a Wretched 'speller' and a People Pleaser- not a good combo. Anyways. I just wanted to say sorry if I hurt anyones feelings!!!! I have received texted concern from some of these but I'm betting there may be more out there. I LOVE that this person contacted me with their hurt. If you have questions or concerns about it, PLEASE come talk to me {and or Matt}.
I have considered taking down the post but have chosen not to. A couple of reasons why:
- This honesty is something that needed to be said. I wasn't attempting to be malicious. I wasn't attempting to bash this church. I was writing how I felt about circumstances in my life. I did not say this was the church as a whole. But my life isn't all sunshine and roses. Sorry to disappoint-Christianity doesn't "fix" life.
- I also wanted to say that those were my feelings at that time. I was only 'allowed' a few minutes to attempt to put it into words. I wanted to write a follow-up post but now I'm afraid that some may think it's to apease them. What I didn't get to say in those few minutes was that I am overly sad to leave The Church we've been in for the past two years!!! The community God has built. It's something we've never experienced. I've actually talked about that in a previous 5MF post: Community and several other posts {THE Church, What I'm Called to Do}, just not during my hurting while writing that post.
Facts:
I love God!
I love that He loved me even though I'm a big fat sinner!
I love that He no longer sees any of that past the blood of Christ that covers me!
I love the journey God has taken me on thus far. INCLUDING being at this church!!!
I love The Church at Central!
I love what God has taught us at this church!
I love where God is taking us now!
I will not shy away from the truth though. Bringing sin into the light is what the Bible asks us to do. I will not deny that this church as well as ALL churches in America have faults. The Church is...people. People who follow Christ. Those people still = sinners. The Church at this church loved on us more than we ever expected. That's part of how God drew us to this place. I was so full of joy, even just those 1st few weeks we were here, because of their love for us. I'm putting this out there because I want to live, as I've said a bazillion times before, a Transparent Christian Life! "In all that I am a Christ-follower. THAT sums up my entire being. It defines who I am in every other realm. It directs how I live in every situation."
The goal of this blog is to let me write. I love writing. We {christians} are called to make disciples As we are Going. I want to make disciples teaching them how I am 'dealing' with any and everything situation as I'm going. This is my outlet. As a stay-at-home-mom, you kind of have to make those outlets happen. It may not do all these things at once but this is my purpose:
Gossip Kills. Please come talk to us!
I have come to the conclusion that living a transparent Christian life terrifies people… I have found it far easier to live it, then to deal with how many of your brother’s and sisters in Christ deal with your transparency. I will NOT go back to putting a smile on and pretending everything in life is easy and wonderful all the time… That is not my witness. Even Christ told people following him would be difficult, are we now supposed to “sell” people on a rosy lifestyle? Is not putting a smile on and pretending everything is ok when it’s not lying? Who gains form this action, the person faking it never gets the prayer of comfort they need and those around them feel worse about their own situations because “everyone has it more together” then they do…
Your last sentence is the most powerful to me and not just because of my current situation… Even with all I’ve been through the lure of gossip is still hard to resist. Even after everything, when someone started to gossip to me last night it took me awhile to recognize it and end the conversation… An entire ministry we loved was taken down by lying and gossip and I STILL struggle to recognize it when it’s in front of me! GOSSIP KILLS!
It’s been hard for be to become more and more open with what’s going on in my life. Partly because I’ve seen so many people struggle trying to keep up the act and thought that was what Christianity should look like.
There is already so much floating around about this silly post. It’s starting to come back to us but not via the ones ‘offended’ by it. That was never my intent! I just needed to share my hurt.
I totally agree that I too get caught in the “conversation” before I realize it’s gossip. I enjoy relationships so much that it’s hard for me to confess what’s going on in the circumstance and or just walk away. But Gossip does kill and Satan is eating will eat your lunch in the dark and tear churches to the ground from the inside out if it’s not stopped! The world is our enemy, NOT one another.
I love you and I’m proud of you for having the guts to be transparent about something that is hard to talk about! It is LIFE and you being real is bringing glory to God. Living in community is what we were created for because it causes us to recognize our sin when we bump up against someone else! It’s each individuals responsibility to either repent and confess or to burrow and ignore. I hope to be one who is open and repents rather than burrowing and hiding my sin!
Satan is the prince of unrest while God is the Prince of Peace!!! Satan is sending my spirit soaring with all this mess while God had me resting in his peace before the rumors got back to us. Thanks for the encouragement sis! Much needed!!!!
Your thesis sounds like my college roommate. She would always tell me that time and time again as I would shirk from telling it like it was. Thanks for linking up to Titus 2 Tuesday.
Kathy
That’s so funny, I tend to shirk from the truth bc I’m afraid to not be liked. It’s easier to be bold online but this ‘confict’ is helping me stand firm to truths face to face, even when it hurts. Love the conscept of Titus 2 Tuesdays. Thanks for the chance to link-up; glad you decided to keep’m going!!!