THE Question

I feel like it’s a bit clique when seemingly every post about fostering address the comment, “How do you do it? I could never foster because -->I’d get too attached.<-- but sadly, that is THE thing I hear from strangers, family, and even close friends. It’s something I probably thought years ago even if I wouldn’t have said it out loud. I’ve learned there’s some major breakdown when we have this thought process though.

I’m not here to make anyone feel guilty for not fostering, embarrassed for asking that question, or even ashamed for thinking this way. I do want to make people thing for a moment though. To reevaluate our thinking and motives because it is our core believes that dictate how we think, and our thinking how we behave.

So, when someone asks, How do you do it? I could never foster, I’d get too attached.“ I just want to cry and shout and jump with joy and walk them through my family’s journey and ask,

“How could you not!?

Do you think I am heartless and am not the kind of person who would cry over the bag of teeth?

Would you rather these innocent children live in houses with there’s no chance for attachment, real love, belonging?

Should we leave it up to the pagans of this world to show them the love we are supposed to be sharing in order to point them to Christ?

Can we justify furthering their painful long-term suffering because we might be uncomfortable, inconvenienced, or heartbroken?

Has Christ not enough love showered on us to multiply onto those seeking refuge?

Do you not want to experience His joy that comes from giving all you think you have only to be given more to share?

Do you not want your biological children to learn how to selflessly love at a young age?

Would you rather we sit complacent with where we are instead of growing in our knowledge and spiritual understanding of what adoption looks like in a Heavenly Kingdom?”


I’m not here to say the road of fostering is an easy one; by all means, it’s the hardest thing I’ve even done. I'm not here looking for accolades, because, for Real, we are no heroes, lots of people could do this better, we are just attempting to serve a big God. We'd much rather have more people join us than think what we do is unattainable. I'm not here to scare people off from this hard work.

I am here to ask, “Will you please investigate your heart and what God is calling you to do in the area of caring for orphans?” Not everyone is called to open their house to become foster homes but all of us who claim to be under the Lordship of Jesus Christ, are called to do something. Wouldn’t it be a wonderful day if DCFS was having to turn away families because there were too many volunteering, too many answering the call, too many so they had to be picky about who’s homes were opened.

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