So, this past weekend we decided to stay in Vilonia! Yay for in-laws with a “summer home”. Bahahaha
We laughed, we played, we cried. When all the shiny of a new space and toys stopped distracting my littles from the reality of an overnighter in a different home, the tears set in. Well, at least with the 4-year-old.
A minimum of 3 rounds of this little number was belted out in a sorrowful little girl voice {imagine the cadence of Dori "speaking whale" on Nemo}:
I am very SAD. I just want To go HOme. But I caaaaan’t. It’s not really fair. I just want to go HOme but I CAn’t for a couple more days. I can’t have my own way or my own Bed. It’s making me feel like I want to go Out of this room and go see my MomMy. I just want to go Home” {continuing with some variation of the above}
I was quickly reminded that when the shiny of Church Planting begins to wear off, I may just wanna pack my crap and go home!
I don’t do well with change. I like my home. I don’t really wanna find a new home, sell ½ my junk, redecorate, pick new wall colors, reorganize a new space, find room for my growing kids stuff.
I don’t like not knowing the ins and outs of a new place. I liked that I finally found my way around town. I know people and places. I don’t have to always ask for directions or confess I have NO idea what/where someone is talking about.
I like thinking I know what I’m doing and where I’m going. I liked thinking Matt and I knew what we were doing in youth ministry. We knew how to draw a crowd. We were climbing ladders in youth organizations, camps, and making and name for ourselves around the state. {close friends-- stop laughing}
God’s asking me to put on my big girl panties and be willing to at least pull an overnighter. TRUST Him. He’s only got my best interest in mind. I can sing/cry all day long about how I just want to go home. I want my own bed. It’s just not fair. But what I consider home is wrenched. I Really don’t want to lie in the bed I’ve made myself. And I Reeeeally don’t want what’s FAIR. God’s so gracious.
Choosing to trust!
When I do…I think I gonna realized this new plan is way more glorious an adventure than what I had in mind could have ever been!